‘I’m going to sing songs about optimism and potential. Every failure can lead to success’: Paloma Faith on motherhood, music and moving on after a break-up

The multi-platinum-selling artist has penned more than a few break-up songs in her time, deftly conveying the extreme emotions that follow heartbreak in hits such as Picking Up the Pieces and Only Love Can Hurt Like This.

Yet her new album, The Glorification of Sadness, is different. Her most personal to date, it charts the emotional rollercoaster she has endured since her decade-long relationship with French artist Leyman Lahcine ended two years ago.

While her latest work certainly falls into the genre of a break-up album, Paloma isn’t looking to invite pity with The Glorification of Sadness. Instead, she aims to empower.

The 42-year-old revealed last year that she had separated from Lahcine, with whom she has two young daughters, in 2022.

© Ian West/PA Wire

“It has difficult but when I came to working on this album, I felt like I had to write about it,” says Paloma over a Zoom call from London. “I’ve written about break-ups before but never one that’s involved a decade-long relationship with two children.

“This feels like the first break-up I’ve had that I might potentially never really recover from because, even if I find happiness in the future, it will always be that it wasn’t with my children’s dad.

“I feel sad about it. I feel a sadness beyond my own feelings about our relationship – for my children as well.

“I do still wonder whether it could have been different. It’s difficult not to because we get along really well now. Our relationship is very good as friends. I think it works better because we’ve no expectations of each other now, which was key to building resentment.”

Paloma Faith’s new album

Listening to her sixth studio album, it’s clear that the East London-born singer has poured her heart and soul, and recent heartbreak, into the first music she has released in three years.

Yet the new album also feels hopeful and uplifting. It chronicles the stages of grief she has experienced; her unique, deep, twanging and soulful vocals are as strong as ever as she shifts from feeling sad and wistful in songs like Divorce, to spiralling and self-destructive in Cry on the Dancefloor, then finally to accepting, strong and liberated as she powers through uplifting anthems like How To Leave Your Man, Say My Name and God in a Dress.

 

 

“Time is an amazing healer,” Paloma observes. “If you’re existential, which I am, there’s no right or wrong direction to choose. Every failure can lead to success and every success can lead to failure. This is just my lot. It happened but I’m not going to be defined by it. I’m going to sing songs about potential, optimism and continuing on.

“That’s important to me and I think it’s a good message. Often you get songs that are either about being completely broken by a relationship or songs that are so empowered they almost infer there weren’t many feelings to start with. I’ve tried to write something in between; empowered but with empathy and compassion for the sadness as well.”

Music as therapy

In the aftermath of her break-up, grounding herself in her music and pouring her tangled and fluctuating emotions into a new album was cathartic.

“It was helpful in the early stages of the break-up when I felt so discombobulated and out of sorts, like the ground was unsteady,” admits Paloma, mum to two girls aged seven and two.

“Becoming a mother in itself was a transitional moment where you’re redefining yourself and your new role. To do this [break-up] on top was difficult and unsteadying.

“Making music felt like a very reassuring, steadying element in my life because my career provides me with a sense of security that maybe relationships haven’t.

“I also felt, particularly on this album, that I didn’t need to worry about anyone else’s opinion, except those involved in the production process, because I’m saying what I felt I needed to say. In that sense, it was a bit like therapy.”

While Paloma still grieves the end of her relationship, today the pain is less raw. As one new track on which she repeats “I need to say my name” with increasing determination suggests, we are witnessing a new Paloma, someone who is learning how to be alone and starting to redefine who she is outside of a relationship.

“I’m pleased with the work that’s come out of it. I feel like the songs really resonate with people and the idea that you don’t have to be a victim when you’ve made a big change or had your heart broken, there’s also an empowerment to it,” she says.

“I honestly feel like this is the first time in my life that I’ve felt very content in my own company and that I’m not looking for somebody else to validate me.”

Stepping on stage

Building on the success of her latest album, Paloma will soon embark on a 26-date tour, including a visit to the SEC Armadillo in Glasgow on April 30 and a sold-out gig at Dunfermline’s Alhambra Theatre on May 2.

She says having the opportunity to step into character, both in her music videos and when adopting her on-stage persona, can offer a refuge. “I really have that ‘the show must go on’ mentality with my kids and with my performing,” adds Paloma. “I’m very confident when I’m on stage… it’s real life I find more difficult to navigate.”

It’s been 15 years since the release of Paloma’s debut album, Do You Want the Truth or Something Beautiful, which launched with her first hit single, Stone Cold Sober,that sold over one million records in the UK and earned Paloma her first of three BRIT Award Nominations.

She went on to win the BRIT Award for British Female Solo Artist in 2015, release another five albums, two of which also went platinum, and became a coach on TV singing contest The Voice. An equally accomplished actor, Paloma has starred in films including St Trinian’s and Youth, opposite Michael Caine, and, most recently, relished the scene-stealing role as villain Bet Sykes in the TV series, Pennyworth.

 

 

Advice for her younger self

Looking back, is there anything Paloma wishes she could tell her younger self as she navigated the early stages of her music career?

“I’d tell myself that I should have made better choices with men and not have this feeling that I owed everyone something,” she says.

“I think a terrible quality that women often possess is that we feel compelled to owe people things and to be nice. Men don’t seem to have that. I just think what the hell was I doing wasting so much time worrying about being nice?”

With a new album to promote, a UK tour to prepare for, and two beautiful girls to raise, Paloma says she hasn’t spared dating much thought lately. “I’m enjoying being pulled between work and looking after my kids,” she adds. “Right now that’s enough.”

© PA

Life as a single mother

Paloma has always striven to shield her two young daughters, aged seven and two, from the media spotlight, having kept their names and faces largely out of the press. At home, the chart-topping artist is, first and foremost, mum. “The kids aren’t bothered by fame or celebrity. To them it’s just my job,” she says.

While being a single mum is tough, Paloma has stayed strong for her daughters. “You can’t really dwell on your feelings when you’ve got kids to look after. Whatever happens outside, I’ve got to put on a brave face, bite the bullet and get on with it,” she adds.

“I find it really difficult but their dad has them two nights a week, so I get two nights off, which a lot of mums in relationships don’t get, so in some ways it works out better for me.”

© Barnardo's/PA Wire

Paloma also draws strength and support from her own mum, Pam, who raised Paloma alone while she worked as a teacher in London. “Mum was a single, working mum. She always says it wasn’t as hard for her as I was an only child, and that it’s harder for me with two kids. I don’t know if that’s true,” adds Paloma.

“She’s very empathetic and very helpful with the kids. She does a lot of babysitting and is a very present, hands-on grandmother.”